VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize