ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Randomize
