You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize