i think my tv is drunk
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
