Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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