Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
