I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Randomize
