As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
