I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
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