you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
