addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
