Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize