so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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