Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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