maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
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