Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Michael Bay diarrhea
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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