Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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