this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
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