evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize