marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize