He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize