In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
