i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
my shit smells like andre
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
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