It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I smell like Dick and happiness
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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