come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
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