bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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