there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize