he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
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