I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize