we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
