im gay
i know
yea but for you.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
