so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
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He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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