yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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