i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
