i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize