I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I hope mine doesn't look like that
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Randomize