yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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