dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
