he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
He kissed a someone with a penis
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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