Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize