You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
