How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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