I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
He keeps bees of course he's weird
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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