my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
