can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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