I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
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