what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
