she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
