You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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