You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
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